- Jun 10, 2019

Keeping The Passion Alive In Your Marriage With Jamie and Tim Holloway

Marriage is more than just a ceremony and a contract signing. It’s a commitment to share your life with another person, that is why it’s important to continuously work on keeping the passion alive between you and your partner. In this episode, husband and wife duo and hosts of the Just Do You podcast Jamie and Tim Holloway discuss how you can do exactly just that. Jamie inspires other women through her personal stories and life lessons from being a teen mom to a single mom to a happy mother and wife. Tim also shares his perspectives on developing a stronger connection and purpose in marriage. Together, they stress the importance of just doing you in a relationship.

—

Listen to the podcast here:

Keeping The Passion Alive In Your Marriage With Jamie and Tim Holloway

I have two guests. It is the first time in 50 episodes, besides me and my boyfriend doing a podcast together that I’ve ever had a married couple on Doing Divorce Right (or Avoiding it Altogether). I’m excited about this because they have a cool podcast. I found them on Instagram because of their Instagram feed, Jamie and Tim Holloway. They have an amazing podcast that I listened to and I think that it’s freaking awesome. It’s called Just Do You. Guys, welcome. Thank you for being here.

Thank you. We’re excited to be here.

I’m glad to have you because what you guys are doing is super cool. It goes along with my whole thing, saving and working on marriages. Tell my readers exactly what Just Do You is all about if you can.

There is a story behind the name, Just Do You. You talk about sex on here, right?

Yes, you can. It’s completely explicit. Do whatever you want.

I went through probably two weeks where I could not get enough of my husband. We were doing it twice a day. The normal for us is once a day, every other day.

Once a day is normal. How long have you been married?

We’ve been together for two years when we got married in 2018.

You have sex every day?

Almost every day.

This is why they are still married. This is what I do. When I coach, I say, “You need to have sex with your partner.” I love this already.

I was hungry for two weeks. I finally looked at him one evening, I’m like, “Can you handle this or is this too much for you?” He looked at me and he goes, “Just do you. Don’t worry about it. If I’m not in the mood, you’ll get me in the mood.”

I’m going to use that quote for the rest of my life because it’s true. That’s how I feel, too. “If I’m out in the mood, I’ll get there. Keep touching me, I’ll get there.” Just do you, that’s where the name of the podcast came from.

For the next couple of days, it stuck with me. It was like, “Just do you.” I could not get that out of my mind. I’m like, “Babe, I need to do something about this. This is good.” One of my goals is to have a product line that’s inspirational and women are going to want to have. I started looking and I’m like, “I’m going to get a coffee mug. There’s nothing out there.” We’ve started doing all this research and I’m like, “That’s my new tagline, Just Do You.”

Keeping Passion Alive: At any moment or any time, if you want to be intimate and close, just go for it.

That’s your hashtag. That’s great because it means many things, too. It’s a double entendre.

One of the things that I’ve wanted to do for a while is to have a solo podcast, but I love having a conversation so talking by myself is difficult. What I wanted to do was start on Instagram and go live from Monday through Friday to build my confidence. In this whole process of wanting to get my solo podcast, everything took off with the whole Just Do You bang. We’ve finished going through a rebranding. We used to be creating love together and we’re switching everything to Just Do You because it means so much. It doesn’t just have to be an individual thing. It can be a couple like, “We’re going to do us and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

It resonates with many different levels. Jamie, your background is marketing, right?

I fell into it. I was a stay-at-home mom for many years and then I started working with somebody. I did it for five years. We worked with youth and it was good. I’ve learned a lot of things and it put me in the place I am now.

Your Instagram feed is incredible and that’s how I found you. I’m always looking around for new stuff and I’m like, “Wow.” With my book, the whole saving marriages, I loved how you did everything as a team and you were supportive of each other. I listened to a couple of your podcasts and you feed off each other. That’s how my boyfriend and I when we do our podcasts together. Your communication is good and you’re great. It’s cool. You’ve decided to do the rebranding and then you moved on to your Instagram. You’re going to do the solo and together.

We do two episodes a week. One of them is the two of us together and that’s on Tuesdays. Thursdays are just me and it’s all about doing you and being the best woman that you can. My target audience is women because we always found, even the two of us together, more women were coming to us than men so we embraced it.

You’re funny, too. I find that people are drawn to authenticity. I feel like you guys are authentic, real and you have a purpose. You tell it like it is. There’s no crap, which is cool.

This is how I naturally am, but at the same time, sometimes, it works against me. I’ll say stuff and it’s like, “Did I just say that?”

At first, we used to worry about her family and her mother hearing our podcast somewhere.

Our kids will listen to it sometimes and it’s like, “You can’t listen to this one.”

What starts happening is your kid’s friends will start finding you on Instagram and you have to start blocking them. It happens when you get famous. I did send you my book, Woulda. Coulda. Shoulda. because I thought you’re perfect for reading it. I think that you’ve read a couple of chapters, Tim. His quote sounds like you were reading it. We have similar voices, usually. That’s probably why I like you.

I felt the same way about you because as I’m reading, I’m like, “She sounds like me.” It’s like saying how it is. It’s a super cute thing. The look drew me in because if it doesn’t look cute, I want nothing to do with it.

When you go to Jamie’s feed, it’s pleasing and eye-catching with bright colors. I like that, too. I’m into that. It’s aesthetically pleasing. I love your whole take on marriage, commitment and the whole sex thing. On one of your podcasts, you talked about the intimacy level and being kind. Give me a couple of tips that you tell your listeners.

It flows a little natural for us. Jamie is at her peak so she’s hot and hungry.Just do you and be the best person that you can be. Click To Tweet

I’m 39.

I hit that probably at 32. I am younger than her but I’m struggling to keep up with her.

It’s every man’s dream.

What’s even crazier about this is that we’re both content marketers and we both work from home. At any moment, any time, if we want to be intimate, we want to be close, we want to go for a walk, it just happens for us.

Do you ever get sick of each other? Do you even think like, “I can’t. I’ve got to get out?”

Sometimes, she bugs me. She’d be sitting at the computer asking me a bunch of questions and I’m like, “I’m trying to work, woman.”

I think that’s okay with everybody, but it’s how you handle it, right?

Yeah. There are other times where we’re both in the zone. We don’t even realize the other person is here.

Because you’re not in each other’s space. You’re working and you’re busy. Do you guys have kids?

We do. We have five.

I have many clients come to me and they’re like, “We can’t find time to have sex. We have two kids and we’re tired.” You have five kids and you have time to sleep together.

Granted, they are older so that makes it a little bit easier. We don’t have infants at home. We have five kids and three of them live at home. The older two are 18 and 21 and they live on their own. We have three at home and they are 12, 13 and 14.

They’re teenagers. It’s even worse. Mine are 15 and 16. What is the problem? I am exhausted by them.

They make fun of us because we have sex so much.

DDR Passion | DDR Passion | Keeping Passion AliveDDR Passion | Keeping Passion Alive

Keeping Passion Alive: A man who’s intimate with his wife rocks it at work. He’s competent and he has more zest for life.

It was funny when we moved into our house. It’s two stories. When they knew we were moving, they were like, “Please don’t let us have bedrooms underneath you or above you.

They were like, “Don’t put us near mom and dad.” That is funny.

The way our house is set up is cool. There are two bedrooms upstairs at the front of the house and two bedrooms downstairs at the back of the house. Nobody’s underneath of us. We put the girls down there. Jordan, our fourteen-year-old, needed a bedroom. He gets to be right next door to us where we share a bedroom wall.

The poor unfortunate soul.

He’s got the earphones on covering like, “There’s no noise with noise blockers.”

It’s so funny because we love routine. We thrive on it so we used to be morning people and they knew it. They knew not to go up to mom and dad’s room anytime in the morning. It hasn’t worked for us in the morning for quite some time. Like Tim was saying, we’re home every single day. We love our lunchtime.

You guys do it. The kids aren’t home. They get home and you’re done. That’s perfect. I feel like everyone needs to find the time to make it happen.

That’s the key there, finding and creating it.

It’s the same as working out, “I can’t do it. I don’t know. I have a problem.” I feel like people make excuses like me. I don’t want to work out and I make excuses not to work out, but I feel like if you make excuses not to have sex, find the time to do it.

Many people, especially women, they’re like, “It’s nighttime. I’m tired. It’s been a long day. I want to go to bed.” You can do it in the morning.

If you keep saying that every night, your husband is going to stop trying or vice versa because no one likes to be rejected. I talk about this all the time in my book, too, and you’ve read. How many times can you say to the guy, “I’m tired,” before he’s like, “Screw it. I’m done?” It’s like the chicken and the egg thing. You’ve got to find the time. Wouldn’t it be great to send a text to your guy and say, “Come home, meet me for lunch and let’s walk?” No one does that.

What man wouldn’t love to receive that text?

He’d be like, “I’m leaving. I’m out. I’ve got to go.” I’ll try that, everybody. You should do that. You should make a mug that has Just Do You and then on the inside bottom, put Just Do Me. You’re drinking all the way down the bottom and it has Just Do Me. How is that? Everyone needs to lighten up. I get it. People are stressed and you guys are a breath of fresh air. I love you and you’re awesome. Where can everybody find you? Jamie, you have a blog.

Yes, I started it. Please give me some grace if it’s not perfect. It’s brand new and even if it’s not perfect, I don’t care.Everyone needs to find the time to keep the passion alive. The key is finding and creating it. Click To Tweet

We like that it’s not perfect. That’s what’s authentic about you. Nobody needs to be perfect and we like people who are real. I like real people. I don’t like the fake bitches out there who are like, “I’m perfect.” You’re not perfect. What is the blog called?

It’s called Just Do You. On Facebook, Just Do You. On Instagram, Just Do You and the podcast, Just Do You.

As it should be because everything should be the same as omnipresence and you’ve got to know what you’re doing. It’s not that hard, just do you. What’s funny about Just Do You is that my whole life, in my head, I’m always like, “Just do you. You’ve got to be you, and you’ve got to do you.” My boyfriend says to me all the time, “Just do you.” It’s a little different, but I have a problem with pleasing everybody. I’m always scared that I’m not enough and I can’t. I’m always thinking, “Just do you.” It’s a little different but I love it. Where are the mugs? I wanted to buy one.

I will let you know.

Everybody, you can find Jamie and Tim. Everything is Just Do You. What else can you tell us? Did we get everything covered?

I would bring home a final thought of intimacy. It’s to just make it happen. A man who’s intimate with his wife, he rocks it at work, he’s competent and he has more zest for life so make it happen.

I feel that oxytocin, the love hormone and everyone’s happier and nicer. I’m always nicer after I have sex.

Who wants to yell and scream after you’ve had sex?

Nobody. My boyfriend and I were on a week off, so I don’t see him for a whole week. I have to go for a whole week and I’m mean. I call him like, “Can we meet for lunch?” We know that it’s not really lunch. Once a week, we try to meet for lunch so we can have sex. I’m telling the whole world this. I feel like this is probably not appropriate. I feel like I have to because a week is a long time. We’ve been doing it for two years. I need to do something because that’s not good. Tim, I love that. That’s great that everyone needs to just do it. Just do you, everybody. I love you guys. You’re awesome. I love having you here. Come back anytime and I want to come on your show, please, if I can.

I need to get that scheduled.

Yes, please. I keep forgetting to do it.

I’ll shoot you a text to get a schedule.

Thank you, guys. I know, Tim, you don’t feel good, so thank you for coming on.

Thank you.

Isn’t his voice sexy?

Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach’s Guide to Staying Married

It sounds raspy. You guys go have some sex and don’t text me.

I won’t do the two things at once.

I appreciate. That’s fun. I love it. Thank you. Once again, to the audience, you can find Just Do You everywhere. Thank you, guys, for coming, no pun intended.

It’s been such an honor to be on your show.

Everybody, you can find me, as usual, everywhere. I’m JenniferHurvitz.com and you can find me on Instagram and Facebook. If you want my book, you can find it everywhere, too. It’s Woulda. Coulda. Shoulda.: A Divorce Coach’s Guide to Staying Married. Give me a review, rate and all that good stuff. Once again, peace, love and truth.