Kids love me.
All kids.
There is not a kid in the world that doesn’t.
Look, do you know a kid? Put them in front of me and see if they love me. (No. Forget it. I already can tell you…they DO.) All children think I’m the most amazing human being ever known to man.
Except for my boyfriend’s kids.
They. Hate. Me.
It’s ok, he knows. And he feels terrible about it…I guess. I mean what can he do? He can’t make them like me, Y’all. Of course, he says they do like like me, that they think I’m nice. (Nice? Yeesh. I’m used to being called FANTASTIC!) I’m sure they think I’m “a lot.” I’m over the top. But it’s been over a year…and I was really hoping they would warm up to me by now! But meh, they haven’t.
And to be honest, it’s breaking my heart.
They simply think I suck.
Listen, dating is tough after a divorce. It’s not just my man and me….it’s a whole bunch of shit. It’s me, my kids AND my ex. And it’s him, his kids and HIS ex. And it’s our schedules. If it were just the two of us, we would be perfectly perfect all the dang time. WE are perfectly perfect when it’s just us. But that is not the reality of our lives; (or anyone’s lives). The reality is that we have to mash all of our shit together and try to make it all work! And it’s not easy.
In fact, it’s so difficult that we fight and argue…and people think we should just “work it out.”
I want to throat punch them all.
Honestly, if you only knew how fucking hard it is to just see each other two weekends a month and a few days in between! And then you expect his kids to like me and mine to get all cheesed for him to be around again. (Jesus Jones on a popsicle stick, I’m so frustrated I could scream!)
Actually, I was so angry over the weekend that’s all I did. Scream, yell, and then some. My “happy place”, Campowerment, burned to the ground in the Malibu fires. I was upset about not being able to go…and I was getting my fucking period. (That is a whole other blog. Seriously, why can’t he understand my PMS? Is it so hard to know I’m a cunty-bitch when I’m about to bleed?)
I digress. I love kids. All kids. (Even if they hate me.) Ok, I’m lying…It’s way more difficult to like kids that apparently don’t like you. But I will die trying. Maybe it’s my perpetual peppiness? My zest for life? Perhaps it’s my love for all things shopping and musical theatre? Who the hell knows–I can’t win these two over. No matter how hard I try….
I’m going to have to bring in the big guns.
Yes….
Who wants to go Disney World first class, fellas? Pack your bags–it’s on Miss Jen. Everyone gets TWO sugary-snacks at the airport…I don’t care what your Dad says! 😉
XO j